Michael DelRay is a gay porn performer who works for companies like Next Door Studios and CockyBoys, and he feels that dating within and outside of the adult film industry are equally difficult.
“Besides making me uncomfortable, if I am with someone who I am interested in, this can be a little embarrassing.”Īt first glance, the most obvious option to many would be to date within the industry, but dating another porn actor can be a struggle of its own. “I’ve been out to the bars before and people will say things to me that, because I am a sex worker, they think it is acceptable to say to a total stranger - complimenting my… size, or my body, making sexual remarks to me, etc.,” he writes in the video’s description. As a result of this fame, Mitchell, who has more than 200,000 followers on Instagram, has had quite a few awkward run-ins with his admirers. “It becomes gradually more and more difficult and then they realize, ‘Oh, this is maybe not the right decision for them.’”Įven after leaving the industry, many still have to deal with the unique kind of fame that gay porn stars experience. “There are people who think that they can deal with it… and then the months go by and I’m leaving every month to go and film and then those scenes come out,” Mitchell explained. In a YouTube video, gay porn performer Blake Mitchell compared dating while working in porn to being in a one-sided open relationship that often feels unfair to the partner who doesn’t engage in sex work. This means that the life of a porn star can be a lonely one, sometimes devoid of romance due to a lack of understanding around the nature of their work. But for those working in the adult film industry, stigma surrounding the work they do can put a remarkable amount of extra stress on a relationship, since the job entails having sex with people outside of one’s primary romantic and/or sexual relationships. Like many jobs, porn is a demanding line of work that may result in long nights at work and long-distance travel, meaning more time away from a significant other.
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And while folks of all stripes inevitably face the difficult choice between relationships and career, for some gay male porn stars, unique professional circumstances make dating a tricky business. The Piece About The Complicated Sex and Dating Lives of Gay Male Porn Starsįinding love isn’t nearly as hard as holding onto it, especially when being hard is your job.